Marriage Proposal 101: The Dos and Donts

by Michelle Phang [[ 1521252000000 | amDateFormat:'ll | HH:mm' ]] in Relationship Tips 

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Since asking for someone's hand in marriage is a serious matter, your proposal should be one that's proper and executed accordingly. Indeed, this romantic gesture must be well thought out to ensure that your bride is purely overjoyed by the sincerity and flawlessness of the whole experience.

After sharing unique proposal ideas for every couple, today we'll be sharing some dos and don'ts before you pop the question. Pay close attention and scroll right down to see them all!


DOS

1. Know the answer before you ask

If a vision of growing old together has never been discussed or she always dismisses the marriage conversation, we advise you to think twice about getting down on one knee. As you should be the one who surprises her, we truly recommend you to be sure that she will say yes to a lifelong commitment. Imagine the terrible ordeal both you and your partner has to face should she hesitate, say yes out of pity or even say no!

2. Get an engagement ring she loves

Don't show up empty-handed! When it comes to choosing an engagement ring do some research before picking one for the love of your life. While she might drop hints about her kind of ring, you can also ask her confidants for more detailed guidance, such as her favorite shape, whether she likes diamonds or gemstones, cutting style preference, her favorite metal color, and of course her size. The rings might seem all the same to you, but not to her. Remember to seek for a jeweler that will provide return policy and resizing service as well.

3. Talk to her parents

Asking for her parents' blessing before you propose could be as nerve-wracking as the proposal itself. Even so, this step is one honorable gesture you shouldn't ignore. Believe it or not, most women want their partners to do this seemingly old-school gesture as a form of respect. At the same time, her parents will appreciate if you shared them your intention before the actual proposal; letting them know that you wish to marry their daughter. So, arrange a meet-up with your girlfriend's parents if you live in the same city. But if your locations made traveling impossible, make sure you call at an appropriate time.

4. Prepare your speech

There isn't a shortcut to perfection, but a little practice and strategy will do. Moments leading to the final question can be very daunting for a man and in such pressure, it is completely possible to just somehow forget everything if it's unplanned. Therefore practice by writing down your thoughts about her specifically, and read it in front of a mirror. This is so that when the actual moment comes, you would be prepared with what to say and even impress her with your mini speech! But too much rehearsing can also add its own pressure and even make the speech feel flat. So, just practice accordingly and finally, let it come naturally from your heart.

5. Plan down to the details

Find out how she wants the proposal to be done, either in publicly or privately. Choose a setting in which your girlfriend will be most comfortable. Also, your engagement story will be shared with your friends and family for years to come, you might as well want to have it documented so you won't miss a single moment. Consider hiring a photographer or simply placing a hidden camera to record the intimate memories. Last but not least, don't misplace the ring. We've heard plenty of proposal stories in which the lady finds the ring before the deed is done, or that he lost it. If you've managed to keep the ring safe until the proposal date, don't lose it when you're proposing. Can you imagine dropping the ring on a hiking trip proposal or have it snatched by animals on a zoo trip? Yikes!


DON'TS

1. Linger on the rom-com cliche

Asking someone to marry you isn't just about the question, but the whole experience of it. So never talk about anything embarrassing or even re-enact silly scenes from the movies. It is indeed okay to take inspirations from the movies, but to copy-paste is an unsuggested move. Your proposal should be genuine, meaningful yet creative. Copying someone else's without sentimental reasons is plainly a hollow surprise. Make this as an event she will proudly tell to absolutely everyone, even strangers. Take your time to find out her true dream proposal and reflect back on your relationship milestones to get great ideas!

2. Underestimate your outfit

It may sound insignificant compared to previous points, but it certainly is. Aside from choosing the clothes to make you look like your most dapper self, the kind of shirt and pants you'll be wearing is also important as you have to keep the ring box safe. A pants that's too tight won't fit your ring box comfortably and when you sit, it is highly likely that it will fall. If you're going somewhere fancy, a jacket is a safe place to keep your ring with or without its box.

3. Be too interrogative

At this rate, you may find yourself trying to delve into your girlfriend's vision of a perfect proposal. But, be careful with your act because she may not find such interrogative questions quite appealing. She may even find out too soon that you're about to propose!

4. Overshare the secret

The tension is there! We clearly understand how much you want to ask as many people as possible for a piece of advice. However, one big mistake that a guy does is to reveal too much that eventually leads to spoiling the essence of surprise. Keep calm and relax. If you have prepared everything properly, it will go smoothly as planned. Share with only your closest people that surely won't spill the beans.

5. Be so uptight

When things don't go as you expect it to be, remember that it's not the end of it. If it fails or lacks, you can always go with the flow. Such stories like, ending up getting down on one knee at the airport security just because the ring gets flagged or finally proposing at home as your partner suddenly can't make it to the perfect romantic setting you have prepared for months, are still fun and memorable to be told after all.


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  • Photography: Megan Beavers

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