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The Do's and Don’ts of Meeting the Parents

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Who wouldn't be nervous when meeting his folks for the first time? Most of us will have so many anxieties and questions popping up. What does his family look like? Will they like me? Will I like them? Instead of getting your mind tangled with all those questions, just follow this basic etiquette guide when meeting his parents.


Do: Dress appropriately

First, you need to do your homework and find out where, when, and what kind of dining style you are invited to. If it's at his house, don't overdress but just play safe with a casually formal outfit. Just to be sure, ask your boyfriend how his parents usually dress in this kind of occasion.

Don't: Be late

Coming too early is not good either. If you want to come early, the earliest time would be around 10 minutes before. It's better to keep your schedule free the whole day, as you might face unexpected situations or awful traffic prior to the meeting.


Do: Show good gestures

The first thing you need to do is shake their hands while introducing yourself and thanking them for inviting you. You can always bring them a thoughtful gift, which you should first consult with your boyfriend. Last but not least, try complimenting them by saying how delicious the meal was or how beautiful the house decorations are. Remember, you should always be genuine to avoid sounding insincere.

Don't: Forget to help out

When you're invited to a family dinner at his house, don't forget to offer your help, even for things as simple as washing the dirty dishes. If his family insists that they don't need your help, don't force yourself and just thank them for their hospitality.


Do: Mingle with his siblings too

Try to start a friendly conversation and always be responsive when someone asks you a question. Remember to engage with his siblings too. You can start by picking a safe conversation topic like study, work, or travel.

Don't: Be busy with your own gadget

You might be shy or simply feel really nervous or uncomfortable, but those are not excuses for you to play with your phone and avoid conversation. Though you don't mean to appear that way, being preoccupied with your gadget will make you seem rude.


Do: Try to engage in conversation

Listen carefully whenever anyone talks and pay attention to what they are saying, even if you don't fully understand the topic. Always try to give a general response when asked. You can start by honestly saying that you are not really informed about that topic, but don't show your objections straight away.

Don't: Talk about sensitive issues

Politics and religions are two topics you should definitely avoid, unless you want to be stuck in an awkward situation. These topics are sensitive to some people, as they are related to their deepest beliefs and can clash with your own. Remember that you're there to start a good relationship, not a debate.


Do: Be yourself

This one is actually both a "do and a "don't". You need to be honest and always let your true personality shine, but there are limitations on what you should share about yourself. A good joke might amuse his parents, but crude, vulgar, or politically-incorrect jokes should always be avoided.

Don't: Monopolize the conversation

It might be a dinner especially planned to get to know you, but it doesn't mean this is a chance for you to monopolize the conversation. Just go with the flow, don't dominate the attention, and always ask questions to his family members too.

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