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How to Cope with His Expensive Hobbies

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Imagine this; a husband and wife couple had a really good romantic dinner, had a great time out at the movies, went back home, they enjoyed a glass of wine together and got ready to set the mood right for the rest of the night, when suddenly she sees the month's credit card bill on the dressing table. Upon opening the letter, all hell broke loose as she saw the credit card charged $8,000 on a set of sport rims and another $5,000 on seats, both for his BMW. She started asking him questions, which was hard for him to answer, and feeling his back against the wall, a huge argument escalated and the wonderful night out was quickly out of the door. His defense? He said he had been saving up for almost a year, a small portion of his income, just so he can spend on the new rims for the car that she also likes to be driven in, and of course, the seats were customized so that it will be a more comfortable ride for both of them. As much as it was expensive, he said that it's an investment for their comfort and that it also makes him happy to add some improvements to the car he so dearly loves.


So, should you accept his expensive hobbies?


If he works hard for his keep, it only makes sense for him to spend on stuff that he's passionate about. As long as it's not unhealthy and he does not neglect your needs and wants, it is only fair that you allow him to fully express himself through his hobbies.


When you show him that you are fair and you understand his needs and wants, you are respecting his personal space and time. A happy him will have higher chances of making a happier you.


We can all agree women have their fair share of expensive hobbies, namely shopping, shopping and of course, more shopping. We're essentially living in a consumerist and spending culture to provide us with an illusion of satisfaction and security. So if you do not want him to stop you from buying that $12,000 Hermes Birkin that you've been eyeing for so long (or rather, if he's buying it for you), then you should never stop him from buying that new $20,000 Ducati motorbike that he's been eyeing for so long even though you feel like it does not serve any purpose in making your home any prettier, at least, it brings him happiness. Sadly, most relationships are quite tit for tat, especially in matters like this.


Most importantly, as a man, he has his innate needs to have his toys. If he loved football as a kid, he's bound to spend tons of money on his favourite team's merchandise, the latest $400 boots and so on. If he loved playing with cars as a kid, it will translate to him spending most of his keep on new parts such as spoilers, rims, seats on his car now that he's a working adult and could afford it. Most guys have that inner child in them, which if you suppress them from coming out, might lead to unhappiness in him.


So, while his spending on hobbies might not make sense to you, and you feel that the money could go into another home renovation or your savings account, it's a matter of understanding his needs and wants. All it takes is a slight balance and making sure he does not go overboard with the spending up until the point where he's neglecting his duties and payments needed for the daily necessities in your lives. If your needs and the daily necessities are met and you have a fairly healthy savings plan monthly, it's not such a bad idea for him to spend his extra money on stuff that will make him happy, is it?

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