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Heart-to-heart Talk: His Passion or His Money?

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"I have a bit of a dilemma here. My husband who has been working as a doctor for years (and may I say really good at his job) now wants to quit his job to pursue his real passion – owning his own restaurant. As much as I love my husband and think he is a very clever man, I am so anxious about his decision to quit. I am a stay at home mom of two kids so financially we rely solely on my husband's income. If he were to pursue being an entrepreneur, we will be financially 'challenged'. I don't want him to quit, but I don't want to get in the way of his dreams either – I don't know what to do! Please, help…" - WifeInDilemma

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Dear WifeInDilemma, it seems very clear that you are torn between prioritizing the family's financial situation with trying to be a supportive wife for your husband and his dream. You currently have a fear of the unknown because you have been very comfortable with the life that your husband and yourself have been able to provide for the family. However, it is completely normal and to be expected that you have anxieties around your husband quitting his well-paying job to pursue something else especially if it's a field of work neither of you has any experience in.


Firstly, before making any rash decisions the most important thing is to make sure that you both are being smart financially. If your husband has yet to quit his job – it would be wise to have a serious conversation about how you both will handle the finance. Building a business entirely from scratch will require time and money. You both need to make sure you save more than enough to be able to provide for the family as usual while still being able to invest in the business. It is important to plan things ahead of time and prepare as much as you can for any possible glitches that may come along the way. The smarter you both are with your financial planning right now, the less worry you will face in the future.


Secondly, while you both are figuring things out financially, it is vital that you remain as supportive as possible with your husband. The saying that 'behind every great man is an even greater woman' is very true. The more you show how much faith you have in your husband the more he would want to make you proud and not let you down, but he cannot do this alone and he will need your help. By you giving him support you not only help him make his dreams come true but you also show him just how much you trust in him to make the right decisions.


At the end of the day, no good will come out of sacrificing your husband's true happiness for a luxurious life – for better or worse, right? You married this man for good reasons and you said it yourself how smart you think he is. The fact that he has been capable of financially supporting the family all these years, it is clear that he takes his responsibilities as the head of the family very seriously. If right now, he happens to feel ready to finally pursue what he has always wanted to do – then this might just be a great blessing to the family as well as to your marriage.

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